Most babysitting problems are not caused by bad intentions. They're caused by a sitter who didn't know the rules and parents who assumed the sitter did. A child who never gets a snack before bed suddenly being given one. Screen time that goes twice as long as usual. An emergency that nobody had actually talked through.
The rules of babysitting are not complicated. But they need to be communicated clearly — before the parents walk out the door — and written down somewhere the sitter can refer back to without making a phone call.
This guide covers the rules that matter most: safety, routines, communication, and what to do when something unexpected happens. It applies whether you're babysitting for the first time or you've been watching kids for years.
The non-negotiables
Most rules of babysitting come down to judgment calls. These four do not:
- Never leave children unsupervised. Not for a quick errand. Not because they're asleep and you'll only be gone ten minutes. If you need to step outside, bring them with you or arrange for another responsible adult.
- Follow the parents' instructions exactly. Their rules exist for reasons — medical, behavioral, or simply personal preference. If you disagree with a rule, that conversation happens with the parents before the job, not with the child during it.
- Know who to call and in what order. Before the parents leave, confirm: the primary number, a backup, and the pediatrician if the child has health conditions. Have these written down, not only in your phone.
- No guests without explicit permission. A friend stopping by seems harmless. To a parent, it means an unknown adult in their home with their child. Ask in advance or assume the answer is no.
If nothing else from this article sticks, these four do the most to prevent the situations that actually go wrong.
Safety rules
Safety rules are the ones that feel obvious until you need them and can't remember the specifics.
Know the home
Before the parents leave, walk through the house. Locate the first aid kit, the fire extinguisher, and the exits. Know whether any doors or gates should stay locked and why. If there's a pool, fence, or other hazard, know what supervision is expected.
Allergies and medications
If a child has a known allergy — especially one that requires an EpiPen — know where it is and how to use it before you need it. Don't rely on the parents explaining it quickly while they're heading out. Ask for a demonstration and confirm you've understood.
For any medication a child takes regularly, get the name, dose, timing, and what "if they haven't taken it by X time, do Y" looks like. Write it down.
Online and device rules
Many parents have specific limits around screen time, which apps or sites are allowed, and whether devices are permitted at the dinner table or before homework. These rules exist for reasons the sitter may not know — a content concern, a behavioral goal, a doctor's recommendation. Follow them.
Door and stranger rules
Children should not answer the door while a babysitter is present. The sitter answers the door. If you don't know who it is and it's unexpected, you're not obligated to open it. This is worth walking through with older children before parents leave, so there's no conflict later.
Routines and the kids
Children do better when their routines stay consistent. A sitter who maintains the usual rhythm — meals at the same time, bedtime at the same time, the same pre-bed sequence — tends to have a much easier evening than one who wings it.
Meals and snacks
Ask the parents what the children are allowed to eat and when. "They can have anything in the fridge" is not the same as knowing whether a snack after 7pm affects how they sleep, or whether one child has a sensitivity the other doesn't. A written meal guide removes guesswork.
Bedtime
Bedtime routines vary enormously by family. Some children need a bath, a specific book, the same order of steps every night. Others are more flexible. The sitter shouldn't have to figure this out by trial and error at 8:30pm. Parents should write it down. Sitters should ask for it before the job starts.
Behavior and discipline
Sitters are not parents. They should not introduce new consequences or rewards that the parents haven't agreed to. If a child misbehaves, the appropriate response is to follow whatever guidance the parents gave — time-out in a specific spot, loss of a privilege, a calm conversation. If no guidance was given, keep it simple and don't escalate.
If a behavior situation is beyond what the sitter can manage, calling the parents is the right move. That's not failure — it's good judgment.
Communication with parents
Parents want to know their child is safe. They don't want to spend the evening waiting for updates that never come or worried because the sitter went silent.
| Situation | What to do |
|---|---|
| Everything is fine | A short check-in after the first hour — "all good, kids are eating" — is enough for most parents. Ask what they prefer before they leave. |
| Child is upset or won't settle | Try the parent's suggested approaches first. If it continues past 20–30 minutes and you're unsure what's wrong, call or text. |
| Minor injury (scraped knee, small bump) | Handle it, note it, and let the parents know when they return. Don't text mid-evening unless it's more serious. |
| Medical concern | Call immediately. If there's any uncertainty about severity, call 911 first, then the parents. |
| Something breaks or spills | Handle what you can, be honest about it when the parents get home. Don't hide it. |
The general principle: communicate more than you think you need to about things parents care about (the children), and don't over-communicate about things that don't require their attention.
Rules for babysitting an infant
Babysitting an infant is different enough that it warrants its own section. The stakes are higher, the communication is harder (infants can't tell you what's wrong), and the rules around sleep safety are specific and non-negotiable.
Safe sleep
Always place an infant on their back to sleep, in a crib or bassinet with a firm, flat surface. No loose blankets, pillows, stuffed animals, or bumper pads in the sleep space. This is not a preference — it is the standard that significantly reduces the risk of SIDS. If a parent asks you to do something different (such as having the baby sleep on their stomach), you can explain that safe sleep guidelines recommend against it. You are not obligated to do something you believe puts an infant at risk.
Feeding
Get specific instructions before the parents leave: how much to feed, how often, and how to prepare it. If the baby is formula-fed, know the ratio and how the parents warm it. If there's breast milk, know how to handle it — it has specific storage and warming rules. Don't guess.
When a baby won't stop crying
Try the usual sequence: feed, burp, diaper, hold. If the baby has been crying for more than 20–30 minutes without settling and you've ruled out hunger and discomfort, it's appropriate to call the parents. Never shake a baby — this causes serious, permanent harm. If you feel yourself getting frustrated, put the baby down safely in the crib and step outside the room for a few minutes.
When you're not sure what to do
The most useful rule of babysitting is also the simplest: if you're not sure, ask.
Ask the parents before they leave, not during the evening. A ten-minute conversation at the start — walking through the routine, the emergency contacts, the house rules — prevents most problems. A good babysitter information sheet makes this conversation faster and ensures nothing gets missed.
If something comes up during the evening that you weren't prepared for, use judgment, then communicate. Parents would rather get a quick text about an unexpected situation than come home to a surprise. What they don't want is a sitter who handled something incorrectly and said nothing.
The goal of every babysitting job is simple: the child is safe and cared for, and the parents trust you enough to call again. Following the rules — especially the ones the parents set specifically — is how you get there.